In midsleep at 1:30 a.m. "Hey, Happy Back History Month because its February."

I never knew there were so many brands of vodka.

Please don't wear heels with a sweatshirt.

Add up all your friends and divide by 2 and that's when you will die

~sounds a little evil...doesn't it?

I think life just throws up on me sometimes. I get so much to do, then I have to clean it all up, it plies on top of me.

(continued) I get crushed beneath the vomit...but somehow I manage to come out with my life in tact and survive.

I was like, "My computer's not working!" Then I realized I restarted it.

I drank a Crystal Light Energy today. It has phenylalanine!

- Uh, you do realize it has 60 mg of caffeine?